Wikipedia:Peer review/Anerley/archive1

Anerley

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I`ve edited the page to a point which this article is no longer in the start phase.

Thanks, Rockybiggs (talk) 16:06, 15 February 2011 (UTC)

Comments by Amakuru

Hi Rockybiggs,

Good work on the article, you seem to have made some good improvements to it.

Hopefully Ruhrfish will come back to you with some useful feedback, but I will make a few general points in the meantime.

As a guideline for developing this article, you might like to look at Radcliffe, Greater Manchester and Ashton-under-Lyne. The reason I suggest those is that they are featured articles on a similar topic, i.e. a suburb of a large English conurbation. Another useful port of call is WP:WikiProject UK geography/How to write about settlements, which provides lots of guidance on which sections to include etc. Broadly, you need sections on History (which you already have), Governance, Geography, Demography and Economy at the very least and probably also Landmarks, Sport etc. if there is enough to say about them.

Another thing to bear in mind is referencing. This is pretty much the number one rule in Wikipedia. Try to find sources for every single thing you write. As an example, the Roads paragraph does not contain a single reference. A map would do for the A road information, and for the ringways scheme you could probably check in London ringways article itself to see what references they use.

Once you have the above sections in place, you will then need to expand the lead so that it becomes a summary of everything significant mentioned in the article. As such, it needs to be longer than at present (probably 3-4 paragraphs), and it needs to closely match the individual sections of the body of the article.

Anyway, good luck with it - I know it can seem daunting at first, but if you keep plugging away, section by section, you can make it. And any work you do do is a bonus for Wikipedia, even if you then have to move onto other things. I have been working on the Rwanda article for the past year or so, with pretty limited time available sometimes, and am finally getting to the point where it is shipshape enough to consider a GA or FA run. Thanks  — Amakuru (talk) 22:57, 21 February 2011 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments

Thanks for your work on this article and sorry to be slow in reviewing it. I agree with Amakuru's comments above and hve some more suggestions for improvement.

• The lead is very short - it should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article
• Nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself. However the bit about Charing Cross is only in the lead as far as I can tell.
• In terms of expanding the lead, my rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way (so more history, transportation). Please see WP:LEAD
• Article needs more references, for example the Buses, ROads, and Rail sections all have no refs at all. The material in Hisotry on the last rocket in WWII and becoming part of Bromley also both need refs. My rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref.
• The refs that are there are incomplete in terms of the information provided. Internet refs need URL, title, author if known, publisher and date accessed. {{cite web}} and other cite templates may be helpful. See WP:CITE and WP:V
• The External link checker tool (on this page in the toolbox) finds three dead links which will need to be fixed or replaced.
• Make sure the references used meet WP:RS - what makes "findanewhome.com" a reliable source, for example?
• The Anerley Gardens section has a a block of text sandwiched between two images - WP:MOSIMAGE says to avoid such image sandwiches.
• History ends in 1965 - has nothing happened in the past 46 years?
• There is very little on the Crystal Palace - I expected more since it was in Anerley and is mentioned in the lead.
• Language is a bit rough in spots - one example of several Anerley Gardens opened in 1841, and provided entertainment to the growing 19th century leisure industry.[2] It provided entertainment to people, not to an industry (it was probably part of that industry). "leisure industry" sounds odd to me - is it OK in British English? Perhaps something like Anerley Gardens opened in 1841, and provided entertainment to the masses of London as part of the growing 19th century trend to commercialize leisure.[2]
• I agree that model articles are very useful.
• Please make sure that the existing text includes no copyright violations, plagiarism, or close paraphrasing. For more information on this please see Wikipedia:Wikipedia_Signpost/2009-04-13/Dispatches. (This is a general warning given in all peer reviews, in view of previous problems that have risen over copyvios.)

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 05:50, 22 February 2011 (UTC)