Wikipedia:Peer review/New Year's Revolution (2007)/archive1

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New Year's Revolution (2007)[edit]

I have recently created, copyedited and improved the article and believe that the article may be ready for WP:GAN. Before nominating the article for Good Article status, I have listed the article for a peer review. Please review the article thoroughly and inform me of any errors, typos, and guidelines I had not followed in the article.


Thanks,

Feedback ☎21:38, 24 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Comments
  • A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style. If you would find such a review helpful, please click here. Thanks, APR t 20:16, 25 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • Also, there is a date that you mean to wikilink but didnt. I think its in the background section "[2006]]".TrUcO9311 (talk) 03:06, 26 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    • Please see WP:BOLD about that. It takes you more time to write the sentence of the whole suggestion down here, than it does to add a bracket in the article. Feedback ☎04:07, 26 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Well my bad, didnt want to interfere in your article. But I see what you mean. Sorry.TrUcO9311 (talk) 15:45, 26 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • I'll hit you with a couple of quick comments right now, more to come. MPJ-DK (talk) 07:50, 27 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • You rely too much on one source wwe.com, it's made worse by the fact that it's a primary source as well it would help it's chances of becoming GA if you get more varied sources than you have right now.
    • I sourced everything with WWE.com, because nothing in the article was objective. The article is completely subjective, and mostly about feud-growths, and match results. How can any of this be sourced outside wwe.com? Feedback ☎03:55, 28 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • The lead reveals the result of the Cena/Umaga match but not the other matches - consistency please, either all results or no result in the lead.
    • I was told to only reveal the result of the main event in the lead. I personally don't like spoiling the result until the Event section, but that's what I was advised to do as other PPV articles. So, I am going to need more opinions on this particular point. Feedback ☎03:55, 28 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • Tenses, it switches between past and present tense in places you should go through it and check it for consistency.
  • The "Event" section contains a lot of very short paragraphs, ít doesn't look good - either expand the paragraphs or consider putting a couple of the low card matches in the same paragraph. MPJ-DK (talk) 07:50, 27 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    •  DoneI have joined the promos and matches into the same paragraph, while joining the last two matches also together. Feedback ☎03:55, 28 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
  • I have some comments:
    • Citations should not go in the middle of a sentence. Also, there are a couple of places where the citations are located before the punctuation. These should be moved behind the punctuation, including periods, commas, colons, semi-colons, etc.
      •  Done
        • You missed one, but I fixed it. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    • If there is more than one citation for a sentence, they should be placed in numerical order. Also, there should not be a space between them or between the source and punctuation mark.
      •  Done
        • You didn't take the spaces out, but I fixed that, too. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    • Most of the sources are from WWE.com, which isn't going to fly if you want the article to be a GA or FA. You need to find some non-primary sources to add to the article.
    • There is an internal link to WWE.com that should be removed. Websites should not be linked in the text.
      •  Done I removed this for you. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    • I'm not sure if it's possible, but you might want to try and combine some of the paragraphs in both the Event and Aftermath sections. A paragraph that is two or three sentences long is a no-no.
    • Check some of the wrestlers' articles for some free-use images you can add. Images break up the text and enliven it.
      •  Done
        • Good job. Much better. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    • Make sure the titles for SmackDown! and Raw are in italics. Pay-per-view names are not supposed to be in italics, but television shows are.
      •  Done All mentions to the TV Show have been put in italics. The only one not italicized is the mention of Raw in the lead, which is about the brand.
        • You missed a couple, so I tried to go in and fix it. Check over one more time to make sure I didn't miss any that you missed. lol. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
    • Also, copyedit the article. There are a couple of instances where a word or punctuation mark is missing. For example, "Regardless these two losses, at the end of the night, Cena stood tall" should be "Regardless of these two losses, at the end of the night, Cena stood tall." Also, "Next, Kenny Dykstra made his way to the ring, mocking Ric Flair wearing one of Flair's common robes" should be "Next, Kenny Dykstra made his way to the ring, mocking Ric Flair by wearing one of Flair's common robes." Fix these two sentences (I would have done it, but then I wouldn't have examples to give) and check to make sure this doesn't happen elsewhere in the article.
      •  Done
        • I know it is hard to copy-edit your own article since you've been looking at it for so long. I went in and fixed a lot of stuff you missed. The difference is here. Things to avoid 1) Don't start sentences with "and" or "however" 2) Avoid contractions such as "can't" or "doesn't" 3) You formatted some of the citations improperly. I fixed them. Make sure you look to see how I did it and understand the correct format 4) There were a few misspelled words
    • Back to the picture issue, there is a free-use picture of Flair in one of the robes that might be good to use here. A non-wrestling fan wouldn't know what one looked like.
      •  Done
        • That makes that sentence much clearer. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
I'll check back to see how you are doing. Nikki311 15:21, 27 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Feedback ☎03:55, 28 November 2007 (UTC)[reply]
Sorry that I forgot, but I've been so busy with other things. In case you missed where I said it above, I have copy-edited the article for you. The difference is here. It is in your best interest to look over the changes I made so you don't make the same mistakes in the future. The article is looking much better, by the way. Nikki311 23:53, 5 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]
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