Talk:Brian Haner

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Edit request on 26 April 2012[edit]

Brian Elwin Haner, Sr. (born April 7, 1958), also known as Guitar Guy, Papa Gates, "White Chocolate Thunder" or "Ambassador Thunder" is an American musician, comedian, ex-porn star, (unofficial) ambassador, and author. Haner is known for touring with fellow stand-up comedian/ventriloquist Jeff Dunham, as in the 2008 holiday program, Jeff Dunham's Very Special Christmas Special, and for "creating" Synyster Gates.

Early life Haner got his first guitar when he was 5 years old, after seeing The Beatles perform on The Ed Sullivan Show. He joined his first band, The Plastic Mind, when he was ten years old.[1] Before he was a great comedian he was a porn star, under the name "White Chocolate Thunder". While in porn he won many prestigious awards, including one for most pussy in one scene and most erotic films known to man, most of them involving some kind of toys and/or several groups of people.

Career A year before finishing high school, Haner got a summer job touring with Sam the Sham and Pharaohs, best known for their hit songs Woolly Bully and Little Red Riding Hood. During the school year, Haner played in night clubs in the LA area. The following year, he applied for a job on tour with Frank Zappa; although Haner didn't make it past the audition, Zappa later called on him for session work.

Brian also did porn for 10 years under the name "White Chocolate Thunder". This was one of the jobs that he was very proud of. In appearing in such films as "White Chocolate Thunder Down Under", "Zombie Girls Like It Rough" and "Dick Fight At The Wafflehouse", Brian ended his career in porn and went on to bigger things. This job would later lead to his ascension to the position of US Ambassador to Indonesia. He is most known there for legalizing marijuana and prostitution.

After working for several years as a session musician, especially with Motown star Norman Whitfield, Haner signed his first record deal with Polydor under the name of Brian West. They produced his first album "Don't Stop Now". Throughout the 1980s, Haner recorded and toured mainly in Europe. In the early '90s, his composition work extended to scoring television shows and films. From 1998 to 2003, Haner produced his second wife's hypnosis show as well as performing in night clubs; in 2003, he signed with a Nashville music publisher and released two CDs called "My Old Guitar" and "Carney Man". He also developed up a busy program of stand-up comedy and performing his own mainly comic songs.

In 2005, Haner's first novel "Carney Man" was published. After a year spent mostly in Vegas opening for Bobby Slayton, Haner started touring and television specials as "Guitar Guy" with Jeff Dunham. While on tour with Jeff Duhnam, Haner released two solo CDs, "Cougar Bait" and "Fistfight At The Wafflehouse." His most recent mainstream CD is "Jeff Dunham's Very Special Christmas", featuring Dunham's puppets singing Haner's original songs.[2] After releasing "Cougar Bait", Haner did a reunion porno called "Cougar Pussy", which led him to receiving another award for banging cougars. Haner is now known as a DILF for life.

In 2010, Haner Sr. recorded guitar tracks for Avenged Sevenfold's new album entitled Nightmare. Among his contributions were guitar solos for the tracks "Tonight the World Dies,[3] and "So Far Away", which was written by his son, Synyster Gates, in memory of the band's late drummer and Gates' best friend James Sullivan.[4]

In 2012, he released his 2nd book entitled "Ginny Reb", a book about young woman's experiences in the confederate army.

He is also the unofficial ambassador to InDoNeSiA because Mexico didn't want him.

His best friend is also Johnny Christ, bassist of Avenged Sevenfold.

Personal Life He married in 1980 to his first wife Jan Gera. The couple had a son, Brian Haner Jr, better known by his stage name, Synyster Gates, or Haner's 401k, who is the lead guitarist for the metal band Avenged Sevenfold. They also have another son together named Brent, whom is Haner's "favorite son." The couple later divorced. Haner is currently married to Suzy Haner, a hypnotist, former bikini model, playmate, and all around sex goddess. They have a daughter, McKenna, who has rocking purple hair. Brian currently lives in Arkansas with his family and two pets; a miniature pony named Donkey and a finger monkey named Lewis. He is still doing music, but we're not sure about the porn. Or why he's living in Arkansas. No one wants to live there.

References 1. ^ "Improv Ontario, CA Comedy Club | Improv.com". Symfonee.com. 2010-10-12. http://www.symfonee.com/Improv/ontario/comedians/Bio.aspx?Uid=433c7493-6494-4b5b-8c9d-5f26c0bf3b02. Retrieved 2010-12-08. 2. ^ "Brian 'Guitar Guy' Haner has all the luck on Jeff Dunham's tour". MLive.com. http://www.mlive.com/entertainment/grand-rapids/index.ssf/2010/02/brian_guitar_guy_haner_has_all.html. Retrieved 2010-12-08. 3. ^ "Avenged Sevenfold - Nightmare (CD, Album) at Discogs". Discogs.com. http://www.discogs.com/Avenged-Sevenfold-Nightmare/release/2441028. Retrieved 2010-12-08. 4. ^ "More “Nightmare” Details From Metal Hammer Interview! Song Titles, etc. «". Deathbatnews.wordpress.com. 2010-06-02. http://deathbatnews.wordpress.com/2010/06/02/more-nightmare-details-from-metal-hammer-interview-song-titles-etc. Retrieved 2010-12-08. 5. ^ "Brian Haner Timeline". Dipity.com. http://www.dipity.com/timeline/Brian_Haner. Retrieved 2010-12-08. Taylahh 13 (talk) 02:04, 26 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Not done: please provide reliable sources that support the change you want to be made. --Tyrannus Mundi (talk) 02:42, 26 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

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